and I know when my shroud telltales are pointing to port, it means the wind is on the starboard rail.
But what does it mean when the telltales have run all the way up the shrouds to the spreaders - and they are pointing straight up??

In a closely-related mystery...
Know what a fisherman's reef is? When a gust hits hard enough to knock the boat over, you yank on the main sheet, and let it fly. This knocks the wind out of the main sheet, and rights the boat. That's a fisherman's reef.
So, what happens if you're sailing under jenny only (main sail down), and you are still in danger of getting knocked down? So, now you have to ease the jib sheet fast. Excecpt the jib sheet doesn't have a 4:1 block on it. Which means when you reef it, the 20 knots filling in the genoa rip the sheet across your bare hand, giving you a welt? What kind of reef is that called?

P.S. Had a great day playing out on the water single-handed today.